Hunter Safety- 2nd Installment

Night 2 of Hunter Safety Training left me with a treasure of memories to be enjoyed for as long as my memory serves me. First off, the day was a little wacky to start off. The gas crisis had me coasting on empty down to the state line gas station (that's the NC TN state line for those who don't know) to buy a tank for $4.60 a gallon. SG, my hunter safety course partner, got gas there at the same time and also did some thrift store shopping inside. These small country gas stations tend to diversify their sales items by necessity... She scored a girly cut tee shirt that says "Butch's world of meats: Believe us size makes a difference" and has a cartoon of a cow licking her lips. After that she went home to fix lunch and cut her hand opening a can of peas. She ended up getting 4 stitches by the nurse at the Hot Springs clinic. (She was about to only get 3 stitches, but she happened to mention to the nurse that there was still a huge section of cut that wasn't stitched and perhaps another stitch would be good, a comment to which the nurse replied, "Oh yeah- you're right."
So SG and I drove over to Mars Hill later that day, she donning her MEAT shirt and a club hand and me donning my girly outfit- pink ruffly blouse, jeans, big hoop earrings and purple eye shadow. Class consisted of a series of videos ranging in topic from bullets to bow hunting safety to(my personal favorite) tree stand safety to hunting ethics. I fell asleep during the bow hunting safety video but was wide eyed and bushy tailed for the tree stand safety video, which was a series of very bad actors setting up different kinds of tree stands and then getting up in them and falling out, very fakely. It was all I could do to contain the surges of laughter that came swelling in waves from my very gut, like bile rising before a barf.
The ethics video was even better: A series of scenarios of 2 hunters on 4 wheelers getting into situations where there was a moral decision to make. Inevitably one hunter would try to peer pressure the other guy into doing the wrong thing and there would be a cliff hanger. There is this guy in the class who sat behind SG and me who looked flushed and excited all the time and was really into guns and I decided maybe he was writing a manifesto in his free time... Anyways, after every hunter ethics skit, the screen would flash over to a list of ATV safety rules in such small print you couldn't even read it if you were right up on the TV. The excited guy would run up to the TV after each skit and mumble about how he couldn't read it. It was so funny to me and I would crack up and then be baffled that no one else seemed to thing anything of any of it. It was too much. After we watched all the videos and talked about bow hunting some more, the teacher (Game Warden) opened up the floor for any questions about hunting laws (of which there are probably volumes). He seemed really excited, like this was the fun part of teaching the course for him. No one jumped to ask anything, and he said with disappointment "Y'all are the quietest class I've ever had." (SG later told me she thought he had said we were the brightest class he ever had). People slowly started asking questions, a lot about trapping laws and other things. I got my courage up and asked him if anyone had ever called him to say they had found Sasquatch. He said yes. My night was complete.