Monday, April 23, 2012

Operation Creepy Clown...

...is under way. About two or three weeks ago I had a little incident I like to call "some D-Bag tried to poach a turkey way too close to my house early in the morning in very foggy conditions." The said incident involved the blast of an unknown intruder's shotgun, some yelling out by me, and finally 2 warning shots by me above the tree line. I decided that not only do I not like the idea of people creeping around here in the dawn hours in the fog- I also dislike someone firing a gun around here in the fog. However, the D-Bag did not step out and show his or her face when I yelled "Who's there?" twice. Some poachers make a habit of disregarding the law and private property and such. I did go out and get a bunch of official NO TRESPASSING signs that I wrote my name and address on, and I plan to register one of them at the County Register of Deeds so it will be on public record (such is the silly law if you ever want to get someone fined for romping around armed on your territory.) However, I wondered whether my signs would do a lick of good to turn a would-be creeper away. I decided I needed some next level shit. Hence, Operation Creepy Clown was born. Operation Creepy Clown involves attaching clown dolls and/or human wigs to the trees with the NO TRESPASSING signs. If you came across a creepy clown dangling from a tree in the woods with a freshy new NO TRESPASSING sign, would you maybe turn back around and go home and pray to Jesus? Yeah, me too.
The wigs will be attached with arrows.

7 comments:

Laura said...

SCARY, VERY SCARY.

Girl In An Apron said...

You nailed it! SUPER CREEPY!!!! Super, super creepy. I'd run like hell.

Anonymous said...

well, shee-it! i thought i was fighting the big fight with leafblowers in suburbia, but this is so much larger. creepy=power!! your tactics are always admirable. love, emmie.

Unknown said...

Dana Dee I hope you know how much I enjoy your blog. I made honeysuckle caramel sauce this weekend thanks to your brilliant plan from last year (posted after our honeysuckles had already blossomed). The clown would creep me out for sure. Love Elizabeth

Eduard said...

I think you have to add a sound to the clown! Make it more creepy! Looking forward to see you again in the beginning of may, need any help setting up??

Anonymous said...

however unnecessary, a hoot it would be to rig up a mechanism such that creepy clown doll would drop a creepy clown load upon being accosted or otgerwise messed with by any given d-bag/intruder. Separately, your party was wonderful and soothed my soul. Thank you for the great gathering and sharing this beautidul mark in time of your beautiful life. Truly wish i was around more.

Anonymous said...

oh my goodness yes, eduard. I know just the sound and even was set to bring it with me to oarty but sadly it was left behind. Take a look at me now, take a look at me now! D- if you want just such a feature, just holler and consider it done.