A cheap way out (with good reason)

On account of today being my one week deadline for my experimental writing assignment, I hereby write the following post:

Something unexpected came up this week. I have reconnected with an old friend through the virtual world of BLOG. As a principle, I do not believe in internet communication being a subsitute for real live face to face. That being said, I am still ridin high with gladness to reconnect with Ms Dusti(n) Marie Pearson Harlan, aka Lusti Dusti, even if we have not had any face to face in a long while (one little quickie a few years ago). Dusti is my only friend from Charlotte I have regretted not being more in touch with, and it just tickles me pink to be able to read her blog- she is the Halloweenstress.

So, getting back to my writing assignment, I have decided to do quickie little cheap one liners to address all of the requests from my generous readers, and then I am going to tell a Dusti story from the archives.

For Eduard, who requested foreigners in America: The best one liner I can come up with for foreigners in America is: "Good luck, pals!"

For Rachel, who requested a story about my favorite pair of shoes of all times: (Let's see if I can fit this into one sentence...) My favorite pair of shoes of all times was a brand spankin new pair of white Keds, about size 7, worn by a very still woman in a stall next to me in the restroom of Borders Books where I had the absolute loudest fart of my whole life and laughed or 10 solid minutes while watching the Keds next to me not move a milimeter.

For Jordana, who requested a tale of Cumberland Island: Once upon a rainy January, two friends, while camping in January on a lovely island off the coast of south Georgia, were inspired by wildlife to invent a line of erotic gear with names such as: the Armadildo, and Wild Stallion condoms; they laughed until they ached.

For Simon: Food, furniture, and finances are some of the "f's" in my future; others are farting, fishing and a fine, fine fellow.

For Meg, who requested a story about Tupac: Breaking news!!!! Tupac is among the departed, along with "so-called" rival Biggy Smalls. It appears the world just "wasn't ready" for their "rapping."

And for Anonymous and Beth: Even though I walk through the valley of death, I will fear no evil for thou art with me, and there are heights to be conquered; when the blood and the fire shall storm down from the heights, my savior will lift me up to the highest heights of the conquering lion of Tupac...

Please forgive me the one liners, but really my inspiration for the day comes from this memory I have of Dusti.